Cold plunge thought here's an

area where i'm not very good when it

comes to fixing things around the house i'm just

terrible terrible for some

reason i just can't do it a washing

machine broke this last week and it's actually

been broken for a week and a half called around

around to get some help ordered apart it turns

out it was the total wrong part and the

thing that's so frustrating is that it's

not even that i can't fix the washing machine it's that the stress of this thing

being broken and me not being able to fix it and not knowing how to and not

knowing who to go to for help is,

it's like this weight on my shoulders that I just have to deal with for however

long that thing is broken.

And this happens all the time. Every time there's something that's broken,

this is just one of my major weaknesses.

And it drives me crazy. and

I feel like I'm a failure I feel

like I can't do the kinds of

things that I should be able to do and I'm

really smart and I can do a lot of other really great things but this one area

just always gets me and even when I like take my time do PQ reps have patience

with myself get somebody to help me.

I still am just not very good at it and

I think I'm finally coming to the realization that it's okay that I'm not good

at it and I just need to do things like call a handyman and have a handyman

just come and fix all those things and I tell myself I can't do that because it's expensive,

but when we bought a new washer and didn't have to worry about that anymore

the weight off my my shoulders was incredible and it just felt so good.

I don't know why I put those things off like I do and why I make it so hard

for myself, but I'm going to try to be better.